Thursday, January 26, 2006

Mugsy condemns high energy bills

Having just extended my 100 percent success rate in extracting Milkbones from my Kong ball, I come to you this morning with a grave concern. You see, my heating bill this month was through the roof. A typical bill in the ayatollah household this time of year is around $70. This month, it is over $200. I am certain that you are as outraged as I am. Although I do not actually pay the bills, I am still concerned. That extra money has to come from somewhere; what if my parents have to dip into the rawhide fund? That would be most unacceptable. So I must swiftly and forthrightly condemn Atmos Energy for this outrageous gas bill.

It would be one thing if I had recently taken in a family of gypsies or started bathing more than two times a month. But that is not the case. Instead, we have had an exceedingly warm winter. And thanks to my vibrant fur coat, I am able to keep the thermostat set low even when the weather cools. There is simply no reason for this exorbitant bill. As you know, I am not one to throw around inflammatory language lightly. But this smacks of price-gouging, and that is an ugly phenomenon, indeed. The only instance I can think of that would justify this outrageous energy bill is a sharp increase in the share price of Devon Energy (DVN). In that case, the capitalist pug in me would readily pronounce that this is simply a result of market forces at work.


James Beauregard DuPug said...

Is that Atmos Energy or At Most Energy, Bro. Mugsy? At Most must be a Texas satellite division of CenterPoint Energy in North Louisiana - we're fighting the same losing battle.

It's been so bloomin' hot in my neck of the woods, Mama has been running the A/C more than the central heat.

We're even been charged exorbitant water bills and Dad almost croaked everytime a new electricity bill arrived last summer. I haven't said anything but if it's this warm in January, what's it going to be like in July? I worry for Dad.

I'd better get's nearly time for my morning nap in the sunshine streaming through the glass in the front door.

We're lucky, Mugsy, there's a lot to be said for our folks who make sure we're always comfy and cozy. I'd do like you and get a job to help out but between eating and sleeping and napping and eating again, I really don't have that much time.

James Beauregard DuPug

Ayatollah Mugsy said...

I look forward to the day when we pugs can form our own country and nationalize all the utilities. Enjoy your nap, James Beauregard. I'm about to do the same.

alfredsmom said...

Mugsy- perhaps you should start a picket line and gather your neighborhood pugs to help join in the fight against this tyranny. Fight The Man!!

Boomer said...

I think you should issue a Fatwah against these high energy costs Mugsy.

Ayatollah Mugsy said...

If only there were more pugs in my neighborhood, Alfredsmom.

That is a good idea regarding the fatwa, Boomer. I will consult my religious texts for inspiration and guidance.

rpm said...

Mugsy, glad you mentioned that Texas is having the same conspiracy over there. We had a much higher bill this month. Our mama called the GULF POWER and told them to get out here and reread our meter. They sent a letter saying that they did but it showed nothing "abnormal". Well, mama says bull. Aunt Sue's house, where the dachund's live, had a bigger bill, too. The Gulf Power gave them some money back! What's up with that? Our daddy works for the Department of Justice and we are begging him to investigate this fraud. We believe that the power companies are charging higher rates this month to reflect people lighting up their houses with Christmas lights. Well, we don't have any Christmas lights in our house because our daddy is the Scrooge!

Tyler said...

Wait a minute. People pay $ for gas? I could be RICH!

Ayatollah Mugsy said...

Tyler, I've often thought the same thing. During car rides, especially. But apparently, it is a different kind of natural gas.

Ragus Pug's Mama, I would urge you to have your Justice Department contacts investigate this price gouging at once. And please ask them to misplace my file.