In recent days, we have witnessed a sharp rise in anti-Pug Life activity. Visionary leaders are often the targets of persecution, so I am not surprised by this. But that does not mean I will take attacks on my ministry lying down. Belly rubs, maybe. But not attacks. Witness this mangled piece of paper. This morning, it was a happy, healthy document, without a care in the world. But then it dared to carry an anti-pug message. Look at it now: It is a slobber-covered, shredded shell of its former self. Learn from the paper’s example.
These enemies may be motivated by religious intolerance. They may be anti-pugites. Or perhaps they are just cat people. Whatever the case, they must know that when I am provoked, my fury is unrelenting. I urge you, do not make me take out my banana hook.