- Dog-paddle races across Lake Lewisville.
- Archery. Children will learn to shoot an apple off of their fellow campers' heads. Of course, they will all be wearing turbans as part of their camp uniforms for added safety.
- Multiple daily nap times.
- Printmaking.
- Intense religious instruction, with severe penalties for laggards.
- Sumo wrestling.
- Knitting-for-dogs lessons.
- Daily rawhide-chewing sessions, to promote healthy teeth and gums.
- Tug-of-war competitions.
- Hazing.
- Firearms training.
The camp's top performers may be eligible for membership in the prestigious Mugsy Youth. All campers will be expected to memorize the Quran and Mugsy's Manifesto, an 800-page treatise on canine Islam and pug nationalism, in advance. The fee is $550 for human children and $75 for puppies. Enrollment ends March 31, so don't delay. Space is limited. E-mail me or leave a comment for further details.
Ayatollah Mugsy and Pug Life Ministries are not responsible for the safety and welfare of campers. Additional fees for uniforms, food and rawhide apply. All payments are nonrefundable.
12 comments:
Is this for real? Becaue I LOVE printmaking.
Honored Mugsy, my only regret is that I have no children to enroll in this worthy event. I have, however, as a sign of my devotion, emailed this announcement to a number of my friends with children of their own. How can they possibly resist?
This would be a financial hardship on us, but how can we NOT do this for our beloved Bob? God will provide.
Pansy is Episcopalian and would like to know what allowances will be made for for friends of Allah, as opposed to followers. She is especially interested in the archery, as she assumes that this will include an opposable thumb.
It is real, anonymous one. And it is fantastic.
Karen, my disciple, they cannot possibly resist. Thank you for spreading the word
Episcopalians are welcome at Pug Life, Erin. We are all worshipping the same Allah. And besides, our indoctrination techniques are fool-proof. Just ask Bob.
Happy New Year, oh wise one.
Our mama said we would be able to come to camp if only for the firearms training...we might shoot our eyes out. Is there a discount for multiple pugs?
Mugsy, I had no idea that you were so willing to work with the youth of the world. My only regret is that I have neither a puppy nor a youth for my Peanut is much too young and Snoogans much too old.
Have a blessed new year!
Hey Mugsy,
Found your all-mighty site on Rockwell's blog. Your camp for the indoctrination of our country's ute sounds great but I can not attend. I am a member of DAC, Dog's Against Costumes. I wore a hat once and vowed never again.
Even though I will not be there this summer I will anxiously await each installment your teachin's.
Woof!
Freda
May you get all that you wish for in the New year,Thank you for sharing.
Welcome to the ministry, Freda. Woof to you, too.
I think that a discount for multiple pugs can be arranged. Say, 10 percent off?
Happy New Year to all. May the rawhide get abundant licks in 2006.
Excellent, Chackler. You may pay via PayPal. Please send me an e-mail with Boomer's full name, age and turban size.
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