My friends, I have an exciting announcement to make. While nursing on my monkey foot, I entered a place of perfect calm and clarity. My mind focused, and I understood Allah's plan like never before. And then it hit, smack-dab in my already-flattened face: an epiphany. An idea that touches on all the key missions of Pug Life Ministries -- spiritual outreach, charity, fundraising. My friends, this will be a milestone in canine history. What is it, you ask? I will tell you. A telethon!
Yes, like the great Jerry Lewis before me, I will be holding a telethon. What better way to raise the ministry's profile in France? Allah willing, there will be more exciting details to come.