There are times, my flock, when our loved ones disappoint us. When their actions are so far out of line that they serve as an affront to our personal moral beliefs. I experienced such disappointment over the weekend, my flock. And the one who betrayed my trust was none other than my mother.
She was going to a baby shower. "Mugsy," she asked beforehand, "I know the ministry's coffers are low, but may I please buy a gift for the baby-to-be? I promise it will not interfere with the flow of rawhide to your eager mouth, Your Holiness." I briefly considered her request and then nodded my consent. Longtime readers of this blog know of my well-established compassion for the world's children. Though seldom as attractive as puppies, they are innocents and thus deserve a good start in life. I believe the children are our future -- our future dog servants. So not only did I grant mother permission to purchase a fitting gift for the baby, I also offered a suggestion that would ensure this human had a leg up right out of the starting gate.
And what gift did mother purchase for this child? Not an Ayatollah Mugsy Youth Infant Creeper, as I had recommended. Not even a Pug Crumb Catcher Bib. It is tragic, really. This child could have entered this world at the height of fashion, commanding respect from his or her peers from Day One. Plus, the baby would have served as a crawling, drooling billboard for the ministry. What higher purpose could Allah bestow on a human child? Instead, it will wear some common outfit from Target. If ever mother was deserving of chastisement, now is the time. So let her have it, my flock.
6 comments:
Mugsy,
You are brilliant! Your wit and wisdom has no contention from other pugs afar.
Pug Crumb Catcher Bib - Brilliant!!!!
Perhaps your mother is waiting to determine if this child is worthy of one of the gifts described. I mean, you can just let anybody represent Pugistan.
Transplantedokie has a good thought. Many human babies can be rather disappointing, behavior-wise. Let us have some human quality control on the advertising. Only the best and the brightest!!!
Oh, geeez, Bro. Mugsy. Everyone knows you get baby-stuff at Target and bride-stuff at Bed, Bath & Beyond. I thought you were going to suggest your precious mother bought the baby-to-be one of those funky bumpy Pugistan feeding bowls like you showed us recently.
Behind every successful pug there is a mother, Bro. Mugsy. My guess is yours is a saint. You go hug her neck and tell her you know you would not be the pug you are today without her wisdom, guidance and generosity.
Where do you think the poor woman goes everytime she leave the compound? Neiman-Marcus? Not hardly - she goes out to hunt for dinner - yours!!
J. B.
Ayatollah,
We gets a chuckle every time we stop by your blog. Your wisdom is beyond our belief. We have left you a Rockin' Dog Blogger award on our page. Just right click and save.
Respectfully submitted, Pugsley, Buster, Cricket and little Daisy
Thank you, TG. Keep the bib in mind in case you befriend any little urchins.
This is true, TransplantedOkie and Anonymous One. We cannot have infidels or creeps wearing the infant creeper.
I took your eloquent comments into consideration in making my ultimate decision, James Beauregard. I suppose a mistake can be forgiven. It didn't involve my food, after all.
Thank you for sharing the award, Pugsley, Buster, Cricket and Daisy.
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