Monday, December 18, 2006

Tabloid trash

This is Mallard, coming to you with great reluctance. But I am the ayatollah's servant, so I will do as he says. Mugsy sent me a telegram informing me that he has reached Step 5 in his 12-step recovery program. "Admit to God, to ourselves and to another the exact nature of our wrongs." And so rather than have the ministry try to cover this up, as we would normally do, he has asked me to post an image of this tabloid trash. It nearly breaks my heart to see the ayatollah so viciously maligned. I mean, these photos are clearly taken out of context. That stupid feline paparazzi; I knew we should have waterboarded him for the sake of national security.

But the ayatollah says to post it, so I'll post it. Oh, Mugsy, please come back soon.

10 comments:

JMG said...

This really isn't as bad as it looks. What's the harm, really? It's not like he's addicted to that basted rawhide.

rpm said...

Oh, Mugsy...that's not a crime unless you get caught....try to be more careful next time and not get the evidence stuck on your head and then you can run away and act all innocent.

Zeus said...

Mallard, I'm not sure what would make you think that waterboarding is the answer. Don't you think that's more than a bit harsh? I'm not saying the feline photographer should be left alone, but can't there be a compromise of some sort?

Brave Mugsy...I know if it were me, and I was caught red-pawed with a tampon (not that I would ever play with tampons), I would be mortified by the evidence. May I be like you when I grow up, my friend.

Ayatollah Mugsy said...

Mallard here. I never really thought waterboarding was such a big deal, Zeus. Who doesn't like a little water? But then again, I am a duck ...

Sarah O. said...

ayatollah, you have shown great wisdom by entering rehab after only one tabloid cover.

It's debatable but I believe that it's best to be photographed wearing panties. Even if they're in your mouth.

Winston said...

Mallard,
Please give the Ayatollah the following message:

Oh Great One,
Your compassion has made you appear weak. Unleash the fury of your pug secret police and these despicable lies shall end.

The Grand Duke

Winston said...

Mallard,
Please give the Ayatollah the following message:

Oh Great One,
Your compassion has made you appear weak. Unleash the fury of your pug secret police and these despicable lies shall end.

The Grand Duke

Winston said...

Mallard,
Please give the Ayatollah the following message:

Oh Great One,
Your compassion has made you appear weak. Unleash the fury of your pug secret police and these despicable lies shall end.

The Grand Duke

James Beauregard daPug said...

That magazine cover is just about the funniest thing Mama says she has ever seen, Bro. Mugsy.

Is there any particular reason you couldn't go into business producing greeting cards? Mama bought a birthday card yesterday that depicts a pug finishing-off a pizza and it's nowhere near as clever as your picture.

J. B.

Chelsea said...

One thing we do know is that Ayatollah did not raid Britney Spears' house cuz clearly she doesn't wear panties.

I am sure this is a case of mistaken identity!

XOXOXO
Chelsea