With my beloved Sooners set to take on BYU in today's season opener, it seemed only natural to make a friendly wager on the game with my good friend and business partner Pugham Young. Pugham, you may recall, is the leader of the Mormon wing of Pug Life Ministries. A huge fan of the BYU Cougars, he has attended every game in the Utah school's 133-year history. He remains incredibly spry after recently celebrating his 190th birthday, attributing his longevity to clean living and daily belly rubs. When Pugham called and proposed a wager, I accepted on the spot. So confident was I in the Sooners' ability to prevail, even against a stout opponent like the 20th-ranked Cougars, that I didn't even bother to listen to his terms. For all I know, I may have signed away my harem in the event of a BYU win.
But instead of worrying about such possibilities, I kept my eyes on the prize: what Pugham would forfeit to me when my favored school prevailed. I put much thought into my terms for the wager, but ultimately my decision was clear. I have long been intrigued by the so-called "magic underwear" worn by Mormons, and given my somewhat notorious background, you might expect that I'd ask Pugham for a set of my own. And you'd be exactly right.
Go Sooners! The ayatollah needs a fix!
4 comments:
pugham shall see true SOONER magic before this day is over. crimson and cream forever.
Ouch... What happened oh great one? Has the blessing of Allah been removed from the Sooners of OK?
Cringe...what happened? Does this mean no magic underwear for you?
-Wilbur
Alas, things did not go as planned, with the injuries to two All-Americans and OU's woeful offensive line play. Along with the tenacious play of the Cougars, of course.
I must now try to find out what Pugham sought for his end of the wager.
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