Good evening, my flock. I am emceeing the ministry's New Year's Eve festivities, so I thought I would experiment with some live blogging from the event. It is not quite as ground-breaking as my live blogging from a garage sale, but it should be fun, God willing. We have a big crowd here at the ayatollah compound. Nearly dozens of revelers are drinking non-alcoholic beverages as they await the dawn of a new year. At the stroke of midnight, a tennis ball will drop, and Wendell will no doubt carry it around the house obsessively and attempt to bury it beneath the sofa cushions until mother takes it away. But that is still over an hour away. First, it is time for some live entertainment! Those of you reading along on the blog will have to use your imaginations, since you're not here in my living room to witness the festivities.
And now, I am pleased to present our first entertainer! Performing an edited, ministry-appropriate version of his hit song "Whatever You Like," here is T.I.!