Moving along, I have some bad news to report. The Jonas Brothers had been scheduled to perform next, but they were apparently devoured by a group of overzealous prepubescent girls while on their way to the compound. All that remains of the trio is a fingerless glove and an ascot. This is tragic, truly tragic, my flock. But we cannot let this spoil our party! The Brothers Jonas would have wanted us to continue. So without further ado, please welcome the one and only Carrot Top and his bag of wacky props.
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