I went for a walk last night, as I often do after the sun's tyranny has faded for the day. At the end of the block, I encountered a familiar bark. It was a rival cleric. And this was no friendly bark. No, this was a verbal assault. He pounded frantically on his wooden fence. "Go away!" he barked. "Go away!" I snorted back, trying to calm him down, and sniffed at the fence. Again, his vicious bark rang out. "Begone, heretic pug! You and your followers are not welcome here!" Though I am known for my easygoing ways, I do not take kindly to being called a heretic. So I quickly hatched a plan. Just then, I felt the light tug of the leash on my collar. "Wait," I implored my parents. "I have a present for this infidel." Smiling mischievously, I slowly circled and sidled right up to the fence. "This will teach him," I thought.
Unfortunately, my mother foiled my plot with her plastic grocery bag.
6 comments:
Oh great one next time make sure it is very watery, then it cannot be removed with a plastic bag.
Oh no--foiled again in the attempts to shame those with loud voices with poop through the fence. I am often thwarted in my own attempts at similar lessons. Today, in fact, I was trying to leave some pee-mail on a recycling container (and that's no small feat since I'm a girl and thus require some contortions) and my person pulled me away. That's the danger when giving those with opposable thumbs the leashes....just remember, that teaching usually trumps leash pulls and know that you will have your chance again.
Faithfully yours
Pippin
p.s. my people used to live in Texas too--in Austin. But now they live in Michigan with us.
Mugsy,
Maybe your owner thought that your weapon would be too harsh? Personally I would have done the same thing, and my parents too would have removed it with a plastic bag.
Sometimes I wonder if we really need humans. Wait, yes we do, they give us peanut butter, cottage cheese, and yogurt. Yes, we do need them - just not all the time.
I applaud your efforts, it's unfortunate our parents have to meddle in the affairs at the most inopportune of times.
I have a canine buddy down the street named Fleetwood Cadillac. Old Fleetwood is bigger than me which has caused a few problems as we regularly pee at each other through his fence. I wish Fleetwood would pay more attention and not just shower the whole world.
My old frumpy housemate, Rosebud, got a little too up close and personal right after I moved in with her and Gumdrop and I accidently peed on her forehead.
My mama over-reacts to poop, too. She not only picks mine up and brings it back home...she screams "Yuck! Dirty poo-poo!" everytime I find some sundried stuff I'd like to sniff.
James Beauregard daPug
Your mom should have left it!
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