Sunday, October 01, 2006

A force to be reckoned with

A Pug Lifer in Fort Worth e-mailed me this review from Sunday's paper:


Star-Telegram Arts Critic

In an encore performance Saturday night, Team Pugforce lifted spirits as well as heavy weights at Bass Hall.

The group, which combines feats of strength with a dogged determination to spread the message of Pug Life Ministries, performed its second straight sold-out show before an adoring Fort Worth audience. The extra show was added after thousands of fans were turned away from Friday night's show.

Those lucky enough to gain admission Saturday witnessed an unparalleled display of physical strength. One member of Team Pugforce ripped a pair of phonebooks in half in one motion. Another lifted a Volkswagen Beetle over his head. Iron pipes were bent and cinderblocks were shattered as the touring sensations performed one stunt after another.

Although the human performers provided the muscle, the ministry's canines were clearly in command. Interspersed throughout the performance were testimonials from dogs who said the ministry had greatly improved -- and in some cases saved -- their lives. And about midway through the show, Pug Life's alpha dog took the stage to deafening applause.

Ayatollah Mugsy, the ministry's charismatic founder, called on all the faithful in attendance to live according to the tenets of canine Islam. He also made repeated references to his travel fund.

Throughout the evening, turbans criss-crossed the audience, passed by a troop of young Ayatollah Mugsy Scouts. As the turbans filled with money, the girls replaced them with fresh turbans and ran the offerings onstage to be poured into a massive puggybank. Atop the puggybank was a large yellow lightbulb, set to light up once the bank had been completely filled.

"Nobody is leaving this auditorium," Mugsy barked imperiously, "until that lightbulb is illuminated."

The ayatollah's words whipped the crowd into a frenzy of religious fervor, with many in attendance -- including this reviewer -- converting to canine Islam.


Sarah O. said...

Hallelujia, Mugsy!

Do you do the laying of the paws bit?

Ayatollah Mugsy said...

Yes, Sarah O. And the laying on of tongues to heal the ill and infirm.

James Beauregard daPug said...


Sid the Dog said...

Do the Ayatollah Mugsy Scouts get badges?

Ayatollah Mugsy said...

Yes, Sid. The more money they raise for the ministry, the more badges they get.

Ayatollah Mugsy said...

Unfortunate, isn't it, J.B.?

Anonymous said...

Hmmm..if you take off the letter h, Hugh Pugh becomes Hug Pug.