Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Tonight's debate

I have been somewhat disappointed with the presidential debate moderators thus far this year. Candidates have often ignored their questions, and some of the questions seemed rather insignificant, given the limited debate time. So I have been pushing the Commission on Presidential Debates to allow me to replace Bob Schieffer in tonight's third and final debate. I would be forceful. I would ask the right questions. And I would point out the candidates' frequent lies and half-truths and put them on the spot to defend them.

But the commission has turned me down. It seems that neither candidate is comfortable with being associated with a radical cleric. Why that has suddenly become an issue, I cannot say. But I have not given up on having an impact. This afternoon, I forwarded Mr. Schieffer a suggested script to follow. The script is long, so I cannot post it all here at this time, thanks to my fading
infiDell laptop battery. But it includes such vital, probing questions as these:

  • "Mr. Obama, you say your candidacy is about change. Yet there has been nary a mention of dogs' rights in your stump speeches. What would you do as president that would give canines a reason to fraudulently register through ACORN and vote for you?"

  • "Mr. McCain, given your advanced age, it is clear that you have made an effort throughout this campaign to exude a certain vigor. Are you aware that the Fonz is no longer considered an icon of youthful cool?"


JMG said...

Maybe McCain needs to be involved in a sex scandal--just to prove he's still got it.

sarah s. said...

No politician could take the heat from a straight shooter such as yourself.

They can't handle the truth!!!

Anonymous said...

I really wish you are running for presidency. Can't do any worst!


Psychic Ben said...

I have decided to stop being mentally invested in the Presidential Race, alas I already know who will win; its been dancing around my precognitive joggin for some time now, so I have decided to just not worry and let things happen. I shall not tell you the answer but I am confident I am right, I've been right too much to not listen to my sixth sense.

The Psychic has left the building.

Anonymous said...

You know that Fonzie alway came to the rescue and fixed the situation. Wish we could expect that from the current candidates. Afraid that it is not that simple!! Rabbi Jake

Ayatollah Mugsy said...

There is a woman who's denying to all who will listen that she had an affair with John McCain, JMG. Not many people are listening, though.

Amen, Sarah S!

You must press your human legislative representatives to amend the Constitution if you truly want a canine in the Oval Office, Z.

Psychic Ben, would you care to accompany me on a trip to a Las Vegas sports book?

Rabbi Jake, it is good to hear from you. As always, you bark the truth.