After a brief search turned up no sign of the young intruder, I e-mailed mother to inform her of our new roommate. She said that just last night, she had narrowly turned away a young lizard pauper who tried to rush through the front door. It seems that the ailing economy has hit the lizard community especially hard. Homeless and penniless, they are no longer eligible for the subprime mortgages that lenders were once so eager to provide. So now, in addition to leading the world's largest interfaith, interspecies ministry, I have established Ayatollah Mugsy's Boarding Home for Wayward Lizard Youths. As always, donations are welcome.