Oh great, merciful Allah, we know that you are a busy deity and cannot always follow your favorite football team. But we pray that you will find the time tonight to watch over the almighty Sooners as they pursue their eighth national championship. We pray that you will empower your favorite offense as it rains down touchdowns on the Florida Gators. We pray that you will help coach Bob Stoops, peace be upon him, hoist another BCS championship trophy over his head. And we pray that you will protect the players on both sides from injuries. (Though a minor, 24-hour injury to scratch Gators quarterback Tim Tebow from the lineup -- perhaps a hangnail -- would be acceptable and even, God willing, appreciated.) In Allah's name we pray, amen.
I would like to thank Conan the Chihuahua for bringing some much-needed publicity to the Buddhist wing of Pug Life Ministries. Although, frankly, I find the first paragraph of this story about the praying pooch to be a bit condescending.
Allah, we kneel before you on this blessed holiday with much to be thankful for. We thank you for the bountiful feast that we will partake in, and for the days upon days of glorious leftovers. We thank you for our friends and family members -- especially our great-grandmother, whose propensity for dropping food on the floor is legendary. May the unsteadiness of her fork grow with each passing day.We are thankful that the ministry's problems with the IRS have fallen by the wayside; for the first time since the ministry's founding, we are not the subject of an audit or formal inquiry. And we thank you, Dear God, for the compromising photos of Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson that made this turnaround possible. And finally, Oh Great Creator of the Universe and All Who Reside Within It, Including the Canines You Made in Your Image, we thank you for the congregants who visit this blog. We thank you for those who leave comments, and we thank you for those who lurk silently yet still gain great spiritual knowledge and awareness. And most of all, God, we thank you for those who donate. Allahu akbar! Amen.
